Marriage to Gus?!

This is ow it is ...the question is do i have to get married? Im speaking from the viewpoint of one whos married and yes its that part of u that makes u thoroughly complete yet so vulnerable to a default. Default being it wud always hurt but the good times definitely make up for the bad times. That is if ure with the rite person.

Thats not the case with people who have married for the wrong reasons and kinda wish and hp for a miracle....unfortunately wat u find is entrapment. For me i define mine as love we love each other to a default....wenever we have an arguement u cn see we are tryin to look out for the others benefit and good. 90% of the arguemnts are mostly about ow u care about the other ...and ow u convey that in an arguement is wat makes or breaks d marriage.

I used to be a fan of love is all we need, but abeggi....if theres so much love and no communication forget it....love cannot carry u thru!

Secondly i used to be a fan of love is wat u need in order to marry thats out the window now....compatibility is all ur mentality needs....not compatible and ull go insane cos ud either back down in frustration or be at logger heads....i actually sat down last week and said nawaooo....tru talk there are so many loveless marriages out there...everyones looking for a companion...thats d essence of marriage not love d end....barefeet don talk....

So wen u see me complain about this love tin sef...just leave me o jare...cos then im in the gallows....but then after the turmoil and heartache of love and marriage i find that im walking on the clouds cos im with someone whos compatible and loves me ...which is a bonus...cos i still get swept off my feet which i cnt say for many marriages ....tru tru no one ever says d truth about their marriage....but hey same thing about life u never know wat to expect...u make it wat u want it to be....so according to barefeet truthfully my marriage is wat i make it...ill recommend it cos
its bad... its heart wrenching....its head soaring....its orgasmic.....!

rollercoaster loving to ode loving?!

This love tin sef…I want to say I don tire,,,
But the very reason I tire is wat excites me…
In my favourite phrase “exciting times” and then I rub my hands together
One minute ur heart is bleeding
The next its soaring…
I started out y.day hating myself and wantin my world to end…
Now I feel like yesterday never happened and say nawoo
Im desperately tryin to understand this love tin sef …
But as a woman ure so ruled by emotions


On the other hand I don’t have much to say
Yet I have a lot to say …im loggin on and its like there are no new posts
Im like o…..k where everyone col don catch una…sugarking u just dey put comments I dey wait ur posts na!
GO ON MYNE..awooo! ( ure levels don change now…)
And Juanita and leggy erm that’s all I can remember

Apart from that no one’s writing nothn…well nothing that tickles my fancy
Ok ive got a lil story for y’all lemme knw ur thots its titled

U have to be an ode to get married!

This is a true story and its happening to someone I grew up with..and shes 39yrs old


Sade has had her misfortunes with guys they come along sleep with her and end it with her …the end..
Sha story lead to story and now shes with a guy in London…whilst shes based in Nigeria



Problem 1
She comes over about twice a year to visit but sade stays with her sis wenever she visit she doesn’t stay over at the guys house for wateva reason best known to them

Problem 2
Shes never been to this guys house in the 2 years they been together weneva shes in London they go out for meals etc kill their agro wherever ii don’t have that much detail and she is dropped bk hme at her sisters.

Problem 3
Sade is not introduced to his mother,,,,
This is ow we brought this whole façade to lime light
Her sis that she stays with called her and sat her down u know the naija way

Sade sis; Sade ure goin out with this guy uve never been to his house
Sade; and so its not the most important thing on the list
Sade sis; ow can u be in a relationship with a guy and u don’t know where he lives and u travel all the way from naija to see him
Secondly uve never met his mother or spoken to his mother …and there rumours goin in Festac that the mum doesn’t like u?
Sade; what is ur business let me deal with this the way I know best


The convo ended there and then out of vexation sade pick fone call her bobo

Sade; wen am I comin to see you now…I don’t want to go to another restaurant
Bobo; erm not sure ooo…will let u know im thinking in 2 weeks is that ok
Sade; I guess and erm I remember u told me about ur mum that she stays in London when are we goin to see her


Bobo; erm not sure about that one oo, except u want me to introduce u as my friend to my mother. …But I can’t introduce u as anything else


Sade; Ah y are u speakin to me this way…
Bobo; it’s the truth we got so many problems uve got too many mood swings…and u want us to hop and visit my mum…

That’s ow the first convo ended

Second convo goes like this

Sade; its over 2weeks now I still haven’t been invited to ur house wats happening
Bobo; im thinking we shud even make this our relationship more concrete how about a wedding in august?
Sade; ahh that wud be nice..wat church wud we be having it etc


Third convo goes like this
Bobo; ok im free this afternoon.,. get dressed ure comin to my house
Sade; ah thank God finally she said to herself



They arrive at bobos house at 1500..he tell her to take a sit and he’ll be a minute goes upstairs for about 30 mins comes bk downstairs and says r u ready lets go to bicester.
My people bicester from where he lives is 2hrs journey time
She grudgingly gets in the car says nothing and they arrive at Bicester…
They shop around for another 2 hrs and I mean window shopping…
After a while wen hunger wire sade
She open mouth in vexation and said


Pls do u have £10 so I can buy a drink and some snacks

Na so the guy vex

Bobo; with that ur big bag ure telling me u don’t have £10 If u don’t then me I don’t have
Sade; sha close eye…commot money buy lunch for them

He drops her back home and that was it oo my people…
She began blabbing and telling her sis at home of the story

Sis sade; imagine Ive not eaten all day
He took me to his house and we didn’t even spend time there he goes upstairs and comes back telling me lets go to bicester I thot o…k maybe he wants to take me shoppin
We went to bicester and didn’t spend a dime on me…no food nothing and he has brought me back to ur place….

sade sis; sorry ooo eya erm y u telling me all this ….y didn’t u complain to him?
Sade; I cant tell him na…u don’t know If u want to marry u have to act like an ode?!
Or else if u always tell him ow u feel he’ll think u complain too much?!

THIS IS WHERE MY BRAIN STOPPED FUNCTIONIN! like WTH!


Im sure u guys know where I stand with this guy hes got responsibilities and sade aint one one of his priorities…hes made that known to her but typically shes interpreted that as a positive….pls can someone explain to me is it because of her age that she thinks shes not got a choice anymore thus settling for less and she thinks she needs to be a mugu for the guy to love her? Mscheww…me im not one to hide my feelings so being a fool for a guy so he can love me don’t wrk…I say it ow I feel it…na by force to love?!


let me know wat u think?

Another used to be?

Is it for u to kiss me the same way we did when we first kissed?

Is it ok for u to make love to me like we did the first time?

Is it ok for u to pour out ur emotions to me like u did when u asked me out?

Is it ok for me to be the sole reason y u wake and plan your day cos ure so excited to see me?

Is it ok for u to tell me how much u love me after love making rather than silence?
Is it ok for u to say the right things, rather than be quiet in fear that u might get it wrong?
Is it ok that you plan to spend time with me rather than stumble upon time spent with me?
Is it ok to make love to me with the intent and precision of an assassin?
Rather than with quickly and hurriedly as If u know the end before u began?


Is it ok for u to make promises and keep them?
For the fear of not fulfilling them will mean loosing me?
Rather than act like if u don’t fulfil them theres always another opportunity to do so?
Cos wen we started out u kept every promise for the fear that another guy might step in if u don’t? Now complacency and procastination?!
Is it ok that I dont remain the same whilst all these mishaps are happening?


Cos the thot of me changing is becoming so evident I cant even hide it no more?
Would u be as patient as Ive been... waiting for u to become who u were?
Would u be patient enough to wait for me to return to who I was?
Cos I waited and im still waiting for u ..wud u do the same for me
Whilst I get tired of the unfulfilled promises…the complacency and procastinations?


Would we wait for each other till we return to that which we first loved
Im scared ...would u wait?
R u scared I don’t think so and I don’t think ull wait cos ure a guy…guys don’t wait?! (sigh)

THE ART OF GBOLO(ing) / Faffing

Rite its somein ive always wondered and pondered about
Y do men gbolo?!!!

Definition of gbolo according to barefeet

Gbolo. Its wen a man is feeling relaxed and fiddles around with himself I don’t mean masturbate ooo ..tis totally different… gbolo for example is wen a guy is watchin tv and he has got an itch down there his hands go there to scratch his balls and for whatever reason they remain there and after theyre done they wryly or shyly smell their hands discreetly…gbolo sometimes includes feelin around on ur balls or just playing with ur hair…tangling and detangling it..(that me thinking of it in the best and most innocent notion kinda way ..ill like to hear wat the guys have to say about it?)


My people u might be thinking ow I take know I lived with my bro in naija and men its something I don’t understand. For sure I definitely know hes not masturbating but like smoking it keeps ur hands busy…. and on the other hand its called gbolo (an ondo state term) in English its called faffing about with ur bits down there.

Faffing according to wikidictionary
(British, slang) To waste time on an unproductive activity

on the flip side I told my bros that we girls we so don’t gbolo…and if we do its not to the extent that they do it I don’t evn know men…this convo is totally sounding wrong! point is if ure a male or female do u faff?

My answer

Barefeet – no I soo don’t gbolo..don’t see the point..if I need somein to do with my hands got my hubby..lol and if he aint there…comfort eating works..or a game of xbox

Happy new Yeh!

Happy new Year death!




Well where do I start



I started out on this blogging flogging and logging journey and its been a thot or series of thots on my mind …been tryin to talk about everythin else but this but I guess this is a tribute to nobody



I started writing my blog with the intention of mentionin this nobody but I thot as I carry on in life and get a fuller picture of this nobody ill let u guys in…but I still don’t have a full picture…sounds like im rattling yes cos im talking about somebody I haven’t a clue about!



My FATHER….(note not dad)



Goin back to series one of in the beginning he was the one I mentioned that came round evry now and then ( meanin I seen him approx 3 times in my whole life)

Well lets hit the nail on the head Hes DEAD



Got the news in January and I still cant compose a full sentence about this guy as I don’t even know much about him yet I have too many preconceived ideas about him that I could write a book about him



Things I know/ think I know about him



He was/is fair skinned

I look like him

Hes very tall

He was a lawyer

His dad is a justice

He had a stroke

He left my mum when he was needed most

He was a man of many words yet so few words wen asked a qs

His favourite phrase “ nothing special” i.e “y haven’t u called – nothing special…no reason

He never say bye before hanging up

He never knew my bday

Or he acted like he didn’t know or didn’t want to know

He had a stroke





Things I don’t know

Where he lived

His new wife

His children my step siblings (still trying to get used to that fact)

His age

His birthday

His thots

His personality



In other words I never knew much about this man yet spoke to him quite often on the fone …of which he never asked me much wenever he spoke to me ..his excuse there are things that are not to be spoken about on the fone wen we see thatll be better



He thot he had soo much time left although he suffered from paralysis due to the stroke



He showed so much care by callin me all the time yet soo little care wen it came to things that really mattered, like who I am ?…he never seemed to want to know anything about me ..he was quite content with the fact that he spoke to me on a regular basis that did it for him.





As u can see this is an absolute ramble which is quite annoyin for myself because these are the thots that are floating in my head



HOW CAN U HAVE A CHILD AND BE SO WILLING TO LET GO OF RESPONSIBILITY AND ALWAYS POSTPONE EVRYTHING THAT CONCERNS THAT CHILD ?



Ill continue this post later and promise itll be a lot more organised ….

my ideal proposal

Tis a sunny day as we prance around @ work
Emails pave our thoughts as pc’s quack
Then a text message telling me to pack
Toothbrush, passport, nothing more than a sack
Even more im not allowed to ask?


With the rhythm of my heart going faster
With my head thirsting for the answers
I do as I am told
Then another text
London heathrow 1900



I hop in a cab
Trying to look fab
Yet calm with a handkerchief to dab
Arrive at the airport in a splash

There he is the reason Im here
All over my face my thoughts are crystal clear
It was like a movie premiere
Dressed in a suit tapered with black silk
Black patent brogues to match
He definitely turned it up a notch


Held my hands his finger over my lips gestured that I shush…
Spun me around and I was blindfolded
Absolutely dumbfounded
I was led away till we got off the plane @ GIBRALTAR AIRPORT
Yes the famous GIBRALTAR
I thought to myself wow I definitely need this holiday!


He planted a kiss on my lips as he left me in the taxi
With wandering eyes I didn’t utter a word
I was driven to a destination unbeknown to me
Arrived at Catalan bay
Where the driver handed me a note
“Head to Caleta palace hotel”
Asked the driver for directions

Upon my arrival I saw the red carpet littered with rose petals
As I was met by a chariot to be whisked away
To the rock of Gibraltar as the next note said
As we halted at the base of the of the rock
Surrounded by the breathtaking sea


Once again with his back to me I saw the Gus he said
“ Take off ur shoes”
I looked around as he held my hand
The sunset
His perfume lingering in the wind
The comfort of his hands
He led me as we walked along the pathway
Till we reached the peak
I took a sneak look at what lay ahead


Table tapered with diamonds
Chair wired with roses
Traditional lanterns all the way from Nigeria
Hot-pounded yam with vegetable soup
Laced with smoked turkey
Lay on the table


We ate we drank we kissed and whilst he offered me
His tongue I felt a chill in my mouth
I withdrew to ask if he had just being to the tattoo parlour
For a piercing?
He ignored me even further
And beckoned for me to come closer
To be met by another kiss yet so passionate
And there it was a metal piece


The thought of it had me feeble kneed
The cool air of the sea
Was all I could feel
And there it was he knelt
Said the words and asked me to be his
And no one else’
There and then I knew
I will be his rock
Stronger and higher than


THE ROCK OF GIBRALTAR!

VAL 2010

Love ....



Tis defined by d moments we share
Like the swirlin of the wind
And the awakenin of the day
Tis fresh and cannot be quantified
tis wholesome yet fractioned
Tis tearful yet cheerful...


Love


tis d stacatto to ur stilettos
Offering its pleasures in little bursts
shhhh there may be silences
But making up is filled with brilliance


to my darling gus' val 2010

I NO GREE!

I don tire I no dey do born again
Im not waitin on my turn anymore
Im tired of saving money

Im tired of waitin for it to mount up

Im tired of watchin it rise and deflate like bubbles in water

Btw this was meant to be a funny post but it seemingly looks like a frustrated post..lol


Ill start again


Twas a sunny day woke up feeling really tired and lazy @ 6am

The night before was amazing as mi hubby showed me wat cloud 9 could feel like esp wen ure not in the mood for travelling..(Left to u to decode)

We put the baby to bed and we started on our journey at 8pm finished off @ about 9; 30pm (there were talking breaks inbtw abeg)

I totally crashed out till 6am this morning


Considering the fact I didn’t have dinner before setting out on my journey I was propa shattered

Moving on

Had to do the usual chores prayin…. Baby…. Bus…. work…

Now at work and its dead sunny outside haven’t got the slightest motivation to do anything so tired I almost feel pregnant…fingers crossed that’s not the case

Then I suddenly get vexed and said this constant chase for money sef I don tire

Come to work and get paid peanuts whilst when I do my personal business (party entertainer) I get the amount that I get paid for 2 days.



i.e I entertain a party for 2 hrs I get £150 whist at work that’s what I get to work 2 days from 9-5….

On the other hand in the name of Christianity I don’t even know what’s rite or wrong anyways wen it comes to the lottery?!

And then I said to myself na wetin I cant be good all my life

Be a virgin

Don’t tell lies

Try to be honest in all my doings

Don’t cheat on hubby

Don’t flirt with guys in the name of innocent fun

Na wetin at least if theres something that is mentioned that can be counted as bad depends on what part of the bible ure reading

It will be said that barefeet PLAYED THE LOTTERY

Isi gini YES I PLAYED THE LOTTERY TODAY!


Im tired of counting the pennies and if/ when I do win…

Hahhaaa ill give my tithe so that can be atonement for my lotterying/ loittering sin

If it is a sin…

I no gree again na only me go be born again ….see u on the winning side of lottery winners!

TALES OF A VIRGIN

TO BE OR NOT TO BE SEX BEFORE MARRIAGE...AGRO!

Alright me i talk for miself....was a virgin found it hard tried not to read all that mills and sex thingy cos it made me think of sex more often than i needed to. didnt let my ears listen to wat my friends had to say about sex cos i knew it wud make my heart ponder...i was also seen as that born again sis so i guess that helped cos they knew they shudnt approach me with such tales.







on the other hand wen i found the right one it was mega difficult and after a year of doin everythin else but sex..lol we cudnt hold on any longer and we did the act. was definitely overrated felt proud that it was him i finally gave my body to but then i felt from my experience of it...it really was so momentary that it cuda waited till marriage ..the orgasm or wateva u want to call it only lasts 5 mins and truth be told the more u do it the better u get at it..and after gettin married to him makin love(notice the differnce not sex) to him was definitely heightenin! compared to wen we werent married.






and then lastly the third stage as a virgin for me was finally realising i needed to get to a peak. there was pleasure from sex but then i took a step back and thot if he comes then surely a woman comes as well..i followed suite to find that place found it and it has been worth the wait the adventure the innocence of not knowing wat it felt like etc..my thing is if i had felt all of these before marriage i must be bored by now..so as i speak now its still a learnin journey gettin to understand wat he likes and i like wat gets us there...therefore the beauty is in the mystery of sex..not knowing it all before u find that special one!






thats my opinion ooo and its worked for me chao