In the Beginning series 3

Have a blast and dont be shy ; this she taught me ...id like to think i learnt from her my humour...and how to make fun of myself cos its not always all about me...


vanity; erm she was one who had birhthamarks that at birth they event thot she needed to see the doctor regarding the scars on her body...only to be told its birthmarks ..not withstanding she still was proud of her skin...and wore makeup only wen she thot it necessary an outing etc...wen running down to the shops she just did it naturally even with the boyfriends that came and went she always presented herself as she was ...although in high school she was called C.M.B (colour me badd) amongst many other things she taught me how to dance to carry myself with guys, and not to settle for less ....although the same cant be said for her...lol


and gpa; not much can be said about him apart  from he worked with one of the famous banks in nigeria and was always into his shares never let money go until u squuueeze it out of him...on the other hand he would rather spend it on cigarettes and the drink ....and as far as i know he might as well have a stick of cigarette in his hand as i type ...


gma; well until 2 years ago i never had a word to describe her ....QUEEN BEE...is the one although that might be thot of as playing it down..she always is involved in everything weddings funerals, naming ceremonies book launch farewell parties cheiftancy tittling the whole shabang....with this brought her a lot of fame and a few friends...and even the few she trusted always did the backbiting ..which then meant she gave up and reclined to friends that were 3 times her age ... this then spilled over to my recent years as the lovely and choking gma i knew became the very reason for the problems i had in my marriage ...the underlying problem not knowing where to draw the line ...or realise that ure no longer my queen bee but theres now an alpha male in my life ...well 2 inclusive my little man (or baba as i call him as he came to take over the role that my father gladly declined) but like i always say theres so many parts to this story that it is necessary i tell the background for you to understand the reasons y i do the things i do today....


she played a vital role as to wat id wanna become as a wife ...but with a lot of the extras she brought i deleted or id like to think i have deleted...i think my husband will be better placed to say this...example being even with the misfortunes that my gpa brought along with himself she always gave him the honour of caring and providing for him ....


example 1
he was going thru a patch in life that meant he was drinking excessively and i mean not indoors but outdoors and he would get so drunk get hit by a car and she would still get him home as per nigerian community news/ gossip goes around more than wild fire...so she heard thru a neighbour n goes to get him ....


example 2
even with his frequent trips to the village which i wudnt name in the name of building the family home hed spend the money on a new found lover of his who made him more okro soup than sense wud permit to his admission...gma finds out and still stuck by him thru all this ...i mean even at an age that u cant be bothered he was like 70 and she was like 60...the new found lover was probably about 45...well ill end his trail by saying it takes two to tango...for a man to cheat it takes a conscious decision on the part of the woman and the man to allow it ...the man must have is reasons for cheating as well as the woman has her reasons for accepting such from him...either ways wetin no good no goood,..


to be continued

In the Beginning series 2...

rite i continue ...the dvd was bought the money was spent on God knows wat..the next bit in my memory is that of my headmistress next door she was my headmistress before and after school which meant i thoroughly had no chance to express or be myself...u know wen you constantly have someone looking over your shoulder as a child at home and wen u go out u got the headmistress...at home there was gma, gpa, bro k sis s and sis b.. on the outside there was the headmistress and her many servants,,,


at home
bro k; was the one with a very bad temper...he'd never hit u...until u give him a reason to ...and just wen u think hes smiling with u he switches like a blooming bulb and smack a slap on ur face...the most i can remember is a time whist doin my assignment lantern on as the wonderful NEPA had decided that it was imperative that there was a power cut...soo lantern notebook and pen i struggled with the maths and he kept on asking me questions abruptly to get me to anwer them and for every wrong answer there was a slap awaiting me...he gave me some sums to do and upon his arrival woe betide me if i get it wrong...he came back and as you can guess i got them all wrong whilst tryin to repeat to him y i got them wrong i had a barrage of slaps resounding all over my face...that was the moment i knew id HATE MATHS FOREVER!


sis s; rite she was never in my way ...she was always into her novels and cudnt be bothered with watever flew past. at her waking she'd pray silently off to the kitchen and grab all the food that left although she still remained a size 8 and if there wasnt any food ...all hell breaks loose..then the errands start...go buy me this and that and make sure ure back within...?...and u dare miss or get ur timings wrong u'd be kneeling all day with ur hands raised above ur head. i dont think shes impacted my life in regards to wat i am today ...but one thing ill say is she taught me to take the bull by the horns cos just wen u decide to put ur novel down and focus on life it might have just passed u by....meaning she never did the right things at the right time cos she always had the notion that she'll deal with it wen shes done with the novel....


sis b; rite a lot of honour and respect does go to this lady cos she was and is the lady that taught me 80% of what i am today...although ill like to think i learnt from her mistakes of which she still hasnt learnt from as we speak...the things she taught me...


LESSONS;;;
boys and men....wen u have the chance to choose the one choose him and done postpone..the old saying that if he is the one he'll come back i dont think applies...she had many choices but cudnt choose wud rather get money of the splashers and the ones that loved her never had money and she cudnt be asked to wait around.,.thus a player ...she played all of them with the notion that she'll choose the right one after a certain age problem is she had to leave nigeria and kind of imagined she'll come back and still meet waiting for her...or shell keep in contact with them to get them hooked on her,,,she was very bad at keeping tabs so lost evrythin in the process....i mean she was someone who knew all the parties and hot spots in festac...now in london she doesnt even know where the nearest kebab shop is...lol


charity; she was very forthcoming with the money the clothes the shoes anyone that ever needed help she always rendered..and she was humble ...this i guess has taught me nomatter where i am rich or poor i never forget ow it felt not to have a roof over my head and i had to live in a hostel for homeless people whilst in  london...but ill get to that later on...

In the Beginning ....

Ill start from as far as i can remember aged 7.
Nigeria
Ok the most i can remember is sitting at the basement of my grandparents duplex( i guess thats wat theyre called in nigeria)...carpet stunk of dust .,,.i always wondered y we bothered sweepin those things as the nigerian weather never permitted for cleaniness...in comparison to the UK u can hoover and expect to meet it that way wen u come back ..in nigeria the way was constantly filled with the dust thus the reason y u sweep and constantly find your carpet filled with dust ...anyways back to the intial intention of this post...laying on the carpet doing my homework and theres three men walking towards me all dressed in a george oh watever dont know ow to spell it ...its wat they wear in rivers state the george the wrapper and the walking stick with a red hat that had feathers in it.. i hope u get the picture


They arrive and ask to see my g.ma i go upstairs and im told to wait upstairs i could feel the hostility and coldness in her eyes as she walked down the marble stairs( they were either too hot or freezing cold there was no inbetween ) she then walked towards them whilst i eavesdropped from upstairs..she offered them a sit but i knew they werent welcome ...the coldness of her voice could be transcribed as sit but ull need to be leaving in 2 mins...lol...


gma; yes y are u here....
men; erm i know its been a while we have come we ask for you forgiveness..we just came to see our daughter and give her these things for her upkeep...( he presents a box of fingers, 10,000 naira. bag of beans and rice...)
gma; thank you and she beckons to me...
me; i kneel ...good afternoon sir
gma; won't u greet him properly his ur grandpa...


rite this was before i knew the people i live with were actually my g.parents not my biological parents. now lets return...
me; oh gudafternoon g.pa y havent u come to see me all this while....
men; ( one of the men beckons for me to sit on his lap) then he says im really sorry ive been in and out of town thats y...
i think he deserves the honour to be described at least


the man who was apparently my gpa ( tall ...and fair skinned dark hair even muscle tone )


man; so ow u doin
me; im ok just tryin to finish mr h.work ( i was very outspoken i guess i still am..i didnt mind if he was a stranger i was goin to tell him exactly how i was feeling )
man; not a problem unfortunately i cant stay for long but i will definitely be back to see you again...
me ; will you be here for my bday ...
man; yes i will wen is it ...
me; ( o...k ure my g.pa and u dont know wen i was born? ) 25  june  in 6 weeks
gpa; not a problem i will be in town so ill come and hand over your present
me; thank you bye see you soon


im ushered upstairs and they said their goodbyes and gma comes upstairs


thats where it all started...


gma; (in yoruba) ill type in english for the benefit that i cant write or speak yoruba fluently but my understanding of it is very sound..for the purpose of the humour ill have some in yoruba...


gma; oloriburuku....se fingers ati owo lama je.... (stupid man surely fingers and money isnt all we can feed on ) she continues ...akpo rice ati ewa se gbogbo nkan to tin je lati kekere ni yen ni ) a bag of rice and beans is dat all uve been eating since u were born...


bro k; we need a dvd anyway this video is so crappy anyways ..i can go to alaba and buy one for cheap...
gma; i dont want to keep the money before they will say i took commissions to take care of you...yes please go buy the dvd


bro k; ( he goes off and buys the dvd)
me ; " well i guess the chocolate tasted really gud" on the otherhand i guess my hatred for fingers chocolate stemmed from this encounter...




to be continued....