IT ALL STARTED REALLY SAD..BUT IT DEFINITELY LOOKS LIKE THERES LIGHT AT THE END OF THE TUNNEL..REAL PERSONAL ENCOUNTERS FROM MY CHILDHOOD TO WHERE I AM TODAY...
Thursday, 16 December 2010
The exchange
The whole thot came to me as I thot to myself how would it feel to have excess meat hanging between my legs... Wen I stand I need to readjust to make sure it dangles right cos apparently they do get tied in a knot often and it hurts like bad...
Ps I'm speaking from a perspective of having a broda and husband ... So having watched them my life I have often wondered...so free me lol
How it'll feel to lift ur package into ur pants or boxers evrymorning
Compared to the flatpack that women have
How it'll feel to wake up with a hard on in the morning and not necessarily being horny.. Apparently wen they sleep blood rushes there.. Thus the reason for the hard on!!
To have a wetdream and not being able go hide it... Cos u'll wake up all wet.. Whilst the woman can have a wet dream and she can deny it wen she wakes cos its hidden
To have ur balls disappear into ur sockets and u have to stand up and physically do the "ball dance to get it out """ apparently chinese fighters hide their balls inside the sockets when they're about to fight so they don't get destroyed by the opponent lol
To have it sag so badly in oldage and the probabilities that ur balls will grow longer than ur penis... This is measured whilst standing up lol
Having a lady grind on u and u might just get a hard on and can't hide it.. But no matter how turned a woman is u can't see it ... Well maybe her eyes will give her away.. But surely that's easier
Having to work hard to ensure u appear bigger or longer than the guy next to u in the cubicle... While peeing.. For the ladies there's nothing to measure apart from the boobs
This is Many more are the thots that fill me mind when I think to myself... " what if barefeet had a mans genitals how would it feel" and I've come to the conclusion.. It would be fun for a day but surely not permanently ... I love the subtlety and discreet nature of my genitals i can wear tight jeans without the feat that it will hurt mr John Thomas lol...
For the record I've only physically seen 3 male genitals in my lifetime so I'm not talking from a perspective of one who has experienced or being around a lot of male genitals so pardon my misconceptions... But from a perspective of one who is being fed by the media about the male physique...
In the lines of JJC's song africa-AWOOO!! I say
FEMALE GENITALS - AWOOO!!
It's ur girl barefeet!
Sent from Praise' iPhone
Wednesday, 17 November 2010
RE; Diaries of a virgin
You rocked me from the onset - Could I look at you with bravery?
I shivered and shuffled until my luck ran out - EAT Mr...!
How long do you fool a longing heart?
I dashed to the loo one final time; stared at myself .
Saw the look of a desperate cub wanting to live in warmth and also roar in delight.
Is she the one I asked again? The mirror said yes..! My face smiled at me and I saw the grin.
The grin .... the grin.....
Zooming four yrs ahead in my Time capsule, I still marvel.
No one could have made me happier - she is certainly a God send.
Who else do I thank but my Alpha and Omega.
She planted a kiss on me - the first, the best, the unexpected, the timing, the longing
It happened so sudden i loved every minute of it - how dangerous we live i thought.
I marvelled at the thought of a new quest - the quest to love to the abyss of passion.
----------------------------
From the mantle himself...
Monday, 15 November 2010
Diaries of a virgin
The thump of my heart reminds me his my first
The way he holds me feels exhilarating even if he is a novice
Watever he does feels like heaven cos I don't know any better
My paraphrase is if I'm happy where I am why go anywhere else
I came he came and exhaustion fills the air
I celebrate my naivety
cos for all I know what I call ejaculation might just be childsplay
There might be better out there
but the height of which I have shared with him seems the pinnacle
and I'm sure I will push to know further
But only with my beloved
I came into this new found truth of sex
Thinking it's all about the pounding the shuffling the fondling
and then proving to him wat a freaky virgin I can be
I've come away from 2 years of sex concluding it's all about
The sweet nothings
The banter
The playfight that leads to amazing love making
Sleeping at the middle of the night with our smelly breath
only to feel a wave of passion seeking my response
I've come away knowing it's not about the act but the serenading and worship of my beloved
I've come away knowing theres absolute bliss in the innocence of a virgin
No comparing partners saying ur ex was better than ur present partner
Just the bliss that ure doing wat u can
and glorying in the fact that ur partner thinks ure the best
Not walking away thinking did I do it better than the ex
His hands fiddle my nipples
Setting alight a wave of excitement
How do I open my legs to ensure
They still look pretty and not desperate for him
How do I Moan so I don't sound like a ho!
Oh no he traces our love down at my garden ruffling the leaves
in search for the fruit that had been locked away for 20 years
He finds it but hesitates to blow upon it
inhaling the scent Which arouses our senses
I wish to return the favour but HOW?!!
I had to spill in a moment of utter silence and promised secrecy
"I've never done this before so please let me know when it's going wrong"
He tries to hold a straight face, but I could see the disbelief in his eyes
Yet the admiration for the honesty
I could also see the excitement that he can tell me just the way he wants it
as i have no idea whats wrong or right
I start at the top of the mantle
Caressing he embodiment of what I have been waiting all my life
And then a shiver consumes me
At the thot of handling the package when it is goin to be delivered?!!
I kissed it trying to avoid any gnashing of teeth
as I know that much that it isn't a pleasant experience for him
I end up using my palms more than my lips for fear of choking
then he steps in taking my Hands off and encouraging my mouth to open
Then we flip the page and just like that
In a moment of hurried passion I saw he was excited as this was more than a bulge
Sliding between my legs in precise definition perhaps 'HD'
He hands the mantle to me but is stopped by the close and tightness of the unlocked garden
A bit more foreplay and for another 30 mins it's seemed like summer was farfetched
Finally to avoid the hurt and bleeding
He strokes with his fingers
and easing into the garden with his fingers
Then he forwards the mantle once more
and on his side there a moan of pleasure
And on my side there utter horror and excitement
(not sure if horror and excitement can be in the same sentence )
There was a breakthrough after another hour of trying to deliver the package all the way I burst in tears trembling ... And utter relief that no one else wuda been worth it...
He's worried but I assure him it's a good thing I'm crying ...there goes my innocence there goes my whole self there goes that moment that i wud forever cherish and above all heres comes my first baby ....!!
--------------------------------------------
its ur girl barefeet!
Thursday, 14 October 2010
Where art thou woman of substance!!
Which then leads me to my initial post I was gonna write about being a virgin
But I guess that sets the mood for the conversation although it may seem I'm saying being anything else apart from a virgin is not good reading ..: far from it.. I'm saying where are all the women of substance in our generation .. Who have got other things to bring to the table .. Like personality, finance, principles etc
Here's why u shud marry a virgin
I've been thinking lately
Marrying a virgin has its ups and downs but the the beauty of it is that the downs can be tweaked to be a positive..
Marrying a virgin means u get to build a sexual life together like from ground zero..
She will always think u do it real good cos she hasn't Tasted any better
She will experiment with u to a default..
Cos she doesn't know any better u will be the icing on the cake that she has been waiting for
You can push the boundaries cos she doesn't know any better if it hurts or not etc
In many ways she can be Whatever u want her to be cos she might have preconceived ideas that can be changed rather than static
And the list goes
On the other hand
She might be so crap in bed cos she ain't done it before and is too shy to learn
Her inhibitions might be too great that u both come to a standstill
She might want to try others partners out since she has tasted the forbidden fruit... So she might think there must be better out there
Also cos she has tasted the forbidden fruit her libido levels cud accelerate whilst u might collapse from exhaustion
Cos it's totally new to her it's like a drug she might get addicted to it
So from my few and many words I hope I have convinced you not to convince u that marrying a virgin is the way forward and wen u don't use protection be ready for the consequences...
It's ur girl barefeet!!
Friday, 8 October 2010
certainty
"AT WHAT POINT DO U THINK TO URSELF I GOT THE MAN/WOMAN IN THE BAG?"
Got him or her in the bag meaning u def feel in ur heart of hearts that they aint gonna leave ...they aint gonna divorce u....they definitely aint cheating on u etc...at wat point in the relationship does anyone ever get that sure...is it wen ure like 90 years old in bed with the lover and waiting to die ...thats wen u know for sure they aint gonna run off with someone else..u probably then know theyre now content with u..and u cant grow apart..etc.
just one the many thots goin thru my mind ...cos all these probabilities aint healthy...but i guess it keeps us on our good behaviour and not taking our partners for granted...but hey thats my opinion..some peeps still take their partners for granted cos they know their partners aint gt a choice...but with all things being equal ...some say that feeling is healthy cos it makes u appreciate what u have ...im with that idea///
ur girl barefeet!
Tuesday, 28 September 2010
feedback regarding pre & post dads death
So she came over to my flat with her husband and boy…my husband left as soon he knew they were coming hoping to give us some space to catch up not knowing she was arriving with her battalion …so much for us catching up ..but I guess she did that cos she didn’t know wat to expect so she came with some backup lol..
She came and there were some awkward silences but since I was the host I had to make conversation…the conversation covered areas such as Nigerian businesses etc and then we landed on the topic we all feared my dads death
She said “oh I thot u guys were on good terms before he died and I was like hell no…I challenged him saying he knew nothing about me…the day I was born my lifestyle my likes and dislikes etc and he just didn’t act bothered he just said ok( ps ull need to read my post on “pre and post” to understand this better)
She was like u know he was under so much pressure and u know the men in our family are all spoiled when they are faced with challenges they just cower…I was like I don’t think that’s a suitable excuse esp after our last conversation,.,,
Through having this whole conversation I almost felt like crying cos I wuda preferred to hear it from the horses mouth instead of someone else speaking on his behalf…but yeh she sha explained how he really wanted to know me and didn’t know ow to go about it,..
Then it was time to exchange goodbyes…she said I shud just try and let the past events be…I put on a voltron defender of the universe look …like men I aint bothered,.,.but seemingly as she said that there was a cold wind that blew that caused me to shiver…shiver at the thot of letting go of the past or shiver from the weather I would like to think it’s the weather unfortunately it isn’t…im still bleeding from the questions I wanted to ask him that I never will get to ask him…I thot I was over him his death and I thot I had forgiven him especially wen I spoke to hubby about these things and I seemingly got comfy…but wen these peeps visited I realised the wound was still fresh a totally different feeling…I can definitely say if her husband wasn’t there I wuda cried…but I had to put on a brave face…
Now the next face begs for me to act and guard my heart…its been two weeks and I haven’t called her yet am I to call or is she to call
Do I go return the visit
And wen is the right time to return the visit
I have these questions in my head a million and one times and no decision I make seems right…I say ill visit in a month but that seems too early to return her visit…Ill say ill call her but then wen is the rite time to call and wat the hell am I to talk about …these are a fraction of the thots in my head,,,any suggestions bloggers?
Ur girl barefeet!
Baphomet!
Was goin to have my hair done in Camden today and I cudnt help but notice the aura and atmosphere around, it was bold …unforgiving and proudly celebrating demonic spirits…as I write this I feel so sad and I ask myself how does God feel in heaven if I feel this way….
I walked past a few tattoo and piercing signs and when I mean a few im talking about 20 signs on a high street which is ridiculous especially what are competitors meant to do…but hey that was the least of my worries…
It started out with the names of the stores the first that caught my attention was the one named worlds end…u can say the connotation to that is a million and one but hey when ure in the Camden atmosphere u will know that was more than a play on words,,,the next store that caught my sight was the one called underworld surely I said to myself that cant be a coincidence…and then to top it all of a few blocks away I saw a store about three floors high it had the head of “baphomet” as the logo …it had no name just the logo and that was it…this link that explains who baphomet is http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Baphomet
The fact that it was three floors high and the head of this creature was that tall…and I said to myself why are these peeps playing about with the occultic and devilish ideas without regard ….its either they have no regard for it so they mock it…or they use it as the selling point for the masses who are interested in stuff like that…
So that has left me with a heavy heart today and I thot id share it with u guys…the thing is I know this exists everywhere but at least id like to think its subtle and subliminal …but by the time u have the devils head as ur logo on ur shop and u got voodoo dolls plastered all over the clothes on sale in ur shop I just think that when u truly know “it’s the worlds end”
Ur girl barefeet
Thursday, 16 September 2010
I SPEAK NIGERIAN!
with ''Do you live in a hut?'', and ''Why is your street called 'Sawyerr Crescent? Is yr father a king?''
And for the umpteenth time I would patiently, if somewhat exasperatedly explain that ''Nigerian'' is not a language.
Except, I realised, it is...
We have a unique, unmistakable, altogether ''Nigerian'' way of expressing ourselves.
We have all been told to ''Off the light'', and ''ExpaNtiate'' on what we mean. We say ''I'm coming'' when we're going, and we're ''vexing'' when we're angry.
We make ''sachet'' sound like ''hatchet'', and some of us see with our ''heyes'', and live in a
'' 'ouse...'' Some ladies wear ''bogus'' earrings, and this is the only country where ''flashing'' is legal...
I love the music of conversations interspersed with ''jo'', ''jare'', ''fashy'' and ''abeg, abeg...''
The sounds that are not words, but are as loaded with meaning as a sub-machine gun...
''mscheeeew''
''hmm!''
''ehen?''
''ewoooo!''
''haaaaaaaa!''
I love that our conversations are as animated and dramatic as the scripts of our ''home video'' movies.
I love that four Nigerians in a foreign country can have a friendly conversation that sounds to others like we are minutes away from kicking each other in the teeth....
And I love how even when we are speaking English to each other, nobody understands what we're saying....
Theres nothing more comforting than sharing the bonds of familiar expression when you are all strangers in a strange land...
So next time I'm asked,
''Do you speak Nigerian?''
I will smile broadly, and answer proudly,
Friday, 10 September 2010
guess? (reply)
guess?
from a mans perspective
Please note.. these are all numbered “1 “
ON PURPOSE!
1. Men are NOT mind readers.
1. Learn to work the toilet seat.
You’re a big girl. If it’s up, put it down.
We need it up, you need it down.
You don’t hear us complaining about you leaving it down.
1. Sunday sports It’s like the full moon
or the changing of the tides.
Let it be.
1. Crying is blackmail.
1. Ask for what you want.
Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
Just say it!
1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.
1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That’s what we do.
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
In fact, all comments become Null and void after 7 Days.
1. If you think you’re fat, you probably are.
Don’t ask us.
1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one
1. You can either ask us to do something
Or tell us how you want it done.
Not both.
If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.
1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials..
1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.
1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.
We have no idea what mauve is.
1. If it itches, it will be scratched.
We do that.
1. If we ask what is wrong and you say “nothing,” We will act like nothing’s wrong.
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
1. If you ask a question you don’t want an answer to,
Expect an answer you don’t want to hear.
1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine… Really .
1. Don’t ask us what we’re thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as Football
or golf .
1. You have enough clothes.
1. You have too many shoes.
1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!
1. Thank you for reading this.
Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;
But did you know men really don’t mind that? It’s like camping!!
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------
pasted from a friends tweet
its ur girl barefeet x
Thursday, 19 August 2010
Player na prostitute!!
Ok my wonderful peeps here goes tale number two…its about a real life story and the guy in question here is called bros Kay. When bros kay said to us he has found a wife and wants to get married we all felt sorry for him. Kay is someone who always got cheated on and never had a long relationship. Why? Me I don’t know, he was always shy to start with and somewhat cheesy with his jokes. Etc never got to hear from the girls tho why they left, literally he always came to me to ask for pick up lines and how to approach a girl and how to dance etc…so I guess u get the picture?
So na so bros kay mention marriage and we were all happy…then we met the girl and we were like rite na this kain girl go chase all the inlaws commot even before the marriage if Kay did something wrong she will come and report immediately etc…she was one of those peeps u would call omo ita translates in English as street girl,,,she was loud and kay was one who looked like he would cower at the sound of her voice,,so the main jist comes where before the marriage Kay happened to be spending more time at a girls place called Miss M…and he would always say they are only friends…
Ill give u a run of the events and u can tell me if it sounds like cheating…
Pre wedding events
Kay is usually given money to spend on his sisters kids on Saturdays to take them to amusement parks etc and guess what he does with the money he goes to pick up Miss m’s kids and takes them along to the amusement park, lest I forget to say Miss m is married but her husband is in America. So in this instance he was acting like daddy taking her kids out etc
The second event was when his sisters boyfriend came to visit…the boyfriend asks for Bros kay and calls Kay ,,,Kay says he is at mile 2…he’d be home in an hour….the sis boyfriend waits for 4 hours calls Kay again and tells Kay don’t worry about coming over ill come and meet you at mile 2. Kay says okay come over, the sis boyfriend goes to meet him at Mile 2 and guess what he is sat at the hair salon with Miss m whilst she gets her hair done. The sis boyfriend had to leave him there as he was obviously busy.
Post wedding events
After the wedding the bride is obviously still harbouring anger regarding this miss m issue ,,,so she says to bros Kay please on ur way out can u please drop me off at the hair dressers as it is along the way….and bros Kay is adamant saying that he cant drop her off …the conversation goes like this
Bros Kay; I cant drop you off
Bride; why it is on ur way she says in a high pitched voice
Bros Kay; I just cant
Bride; is it because u are planning to stop by at Mary’s and u don’t want me to know
Bros kay; yes …wat is ur business if I want to stop by
Bride; ure not going out today if u don’t drop me off
Na so drama start …after much crying and shouting Kay then says to the bride ok ill drop u off but just give me an hour…the bride agreed…only for Kay to return with Miss m in the car seating in the passenger seat..the bride then comes downstairs and walks over to the passenger side….hold it there has got to be a pause here lol if na naija movie this would be a great gen gen moment…u know wen u hear the drum roll etc…
Lets get bk to the story…the bride walks over to the passenger side sees miss m …miss m just looks past her and remains in the seat,,,the bride then walks over to the driver seat and then asks Bros Kay ….please can u tell miss m to move over to the back seat so I can sit down…then bros kay without arguing asks Miss m and she moves over to the back seat and then they head off to their respective destinations….at the moment the bride is tired and says if she knew this is what Bros Kay had to offer she wont have married him…
And im like before una marry u knew about miss m and thot u cud probably change the situation….so in order words u knew the problem before the marriage and didn’t fix it somehow she thot the label of marriage wud transform to a miracle …
This then leads me to a convo I was having earlier “ when a woman sleeps with a lot of men she is called a prostitute but when a man does the same he is given a fancy name he is called a player…” dog na dog …prostitute na prostitute …albeit man or woman…!!
So based on my findings he is cheating under the safe label of “she is a friend” and then comes to rub it in the wifey’s nose…men I for don pour hot water for her body as she balance inside my husbands car mscheww …let me know what u think ,,,is he cheating or not,,,, and is a man a player or prostitute when he sleeps with many women etc
Its ur girl barefeet!
Tuesday, 17 August 2010
17-08-1966
Its amazing that I know so much about you from what people have said
But somehow deep in my heart I feel they are all wrong
U had me at a tender age somehow ive followed in ur foot steps and had my baby early
My dad never got to speak about u, but he was a lawyer before he passed on this year
And I ended up studying law without even knowing I was following in his foot steps
Where do all these things lead me to ….it makes me believe u were just like me
Out to please noone but God
U probably worked as hard as I did, and played and laffed real hard …
Ur life was short, pray mine is longer
U had huge ears like I do, and full lips like I do,,,
Mum the only memory I have of u is when I was taken to the cemetery and I was asked to leave flowers, I never had a clue what I was doing then as noone told me u were my mum then, but hey they cant beat my memory and the genes that made me shiver on that sunny day in naija…I just knew I had a connection to the person I was paying my respects to….later on I found out u were the one, and im sad cos I cant remember the address of the cemetery, I just know its in CMS lagos. Was too young to remember but with every step ive taken I always wish I was confident u were with me,, hubby tells me youre smiling down at me, I wish I can believe him , cos I believed my dad wanted to be part of my life so badly until he proved me wrong, so unfortunately I cant vouch for u that u wanted me to be a part of ur life as well. But like they say a mothers love is different, I always felt my dad was a distance away but somehow I can say I don’t feel the same about u…theres some surety and certainty that ure even closer
I utter a plea, and prayer tonite, I pray to God I find you in heaven and we can have a family reunion maybe with dad but im not sure if im really bothered if he’s in heaven and theres me thinking I have forgiven him…I say I have but my previous statement tells me otherwise…oh well,,, I pray before I die that I get to know u better don’t know how but I cant trust the uncertainty on the other side that we might be in the same place, or where we might end up…
One thing I must say tho thanks for bringin me to this world ive not appreciated my life in many ways,,,as ive always thot death was safer and that way no one is commiting sins and gambling to get to heaven …with death its certain where one is goin..its not about ow u live ur life etc…but hey lost too many peeps in my life that has changed my view of life, eat hard pray hard laff hard and love hard..
Mum I love u..even if I never knew u
Miss u badly that I still cry myself to sleep but then I think if u were alive u wont have let me get married that early ,.cos of ur experience u wuda thot its bad for me, but thank God im doing fine..
Wish I got to know u….and cant wait to see u, all my love
Ur baby girl oluwatee(that the closest yall are goin to know about my tru name lol)
Olayide – born 17/08/1966 died – not sure dem no gree tell me ;(
Monday, 16 August 2010
memo
My people nawaoo na so una fashi my side…anywhoooo ow yall been doin theres
So much to jist about and when I think of the time and energy it would take to type it out I get tired lol…anywhoo movin on ill give yall some feedback about the happenings in the life of barefeet
As per the husband saga so far so good there has not been any more domestic violence and the last time It happened shall be the first and last time in Jesus name. Regarding my dad men if you guys can remember I called the lady that was apparently my sister and she is still yet to call me back so im thinking whats her excuse she lost my number or she got back from naija and forgot that I called, need your advice bloggers what should I do personally cant be bothered to call her again
Men I get many poems wey dey flow for my head…regarding love, the ups and downs of it…theres so much happening at the moment that I def know im rambling in this post. Ok ill give everythin a header and as the day goes by ill fill u guys in
Mums birthday tomorrow
Promiscuity before and after the wedding (so why bother getting married in the first place)
Sid b and how another womans husband is apparently her long lost soul mate so against all her xtian principles she is willing to tear the marriage apart so she can get her soul mate bk
The sexual diaries of a virgin
Love cant fit into a box talkless of stereotype some love and even marry their brother ex and it works..?!
Uni life and how God won the battle
The kofoworola saga they see xtian but apparently them say he must come baptise inside their water for church…there I was thinking xtianity is all the same now there are subdivisions
So now yall can see there is loads to talk about and if I wrote it here ill be rambling so in order of occurrence my first post will be about tomorrow my mums birthday then after that ill write as I see it fit or may be a vote as to which jist from the above my bloggers want to hear first then ill post them accordingly.
CIAO ur girl barefeet
missed everyone wow its been long
Wednesday, 30 June 2010
musing
You evoke majesty in its originality
You surpass my understanding…you revel at my worship
My praise and worship is silent but lord u know my thots even before I speak them
You were
You are
You’re everywhere
In the sunlight
The rainfall
The wind
The gale
The air
The follicles of my being bow at the awesomeness of your majesty
You name alone is worthy of praise
No matter how much I sin and fall short of your grace I know ill never find another like you
You are a precious wonder and im just as good as yonder at the thot that im more than a grain of sand
Like royalty yet so fickle is what I am
You came all the way to die for a grain of sand like me..
When I think of the millions of people in the world, surely a microscope cannot make me distinct in the crowd…
Yet u know all our names
All are engraved in the palm of your hands
My words belittle u oh lord if I spoke since the day of my birth to the day I die…the praises that I utter would never be enough….it will not be enough to say how magnificent u are…..
All the constellation of stars, u know their names…all the children of yours u know their name….yet with my actions I belittle you….
I could never fathom how much u care for me..
I’m not worth it….
If I counted my sins from the day I was born till now, they will be as many as the stars My nature condemns me
My sins surround me
My actions wound me..
Yet u came to saved me..
I will rise…im not worthy but I will rise…above all as I rise help me to see me as u see me…that way I can be whom u want me to be…
ur daughter barefeet
Friday, 18 June 2010
POST///
I feel like im walking alone in this journey of love
Although its meant to be a partnership
I feel I have an idea of love that the other partner doesn’t share
And surely when u both see and define love differently
One might seem complacent whilst the other is tryin to adjust
So what u have is one is ok to sit at the bottom of the mountain
Whilst the other tryin to pull the one sittin up the mountain
I feel I should be thankful yet I cant be thankful for something I cant feel
I can only believe it exists, but cant feel it
I believe he loves me…
But I cant see it…
He’s struggling to show it…
Its almost like teachin him to show it…
And when he shows it ..it is because I gave him an idea and hes gone to do it
The question then lies…if he didn’t love me he wont take up the idea…or is he so bored with the relationship that he at a cross road.
Hes my partner yet I feel so bored cos hes never around, the relationship is based around texts, emails, and 3 min calls.
3 min calls as If I were talking to a friend and not a lover.
Almost formal and usual
# how was work
# how u feelin
# ows the baby etc
cant speak to him about it cos he will see it as a criticism that im not satisfied bla bla bla
he’ll say ive always said I cant never please u barefeet, and this convo just goes to prove it.
I have gone as far as asking why are u stil with me,…its almost like ure trudging along with the relationship rather than having fun with it…he says he loves me that’s y he is still here…he says he’s still crazy about me etc..,.
But he just doesn’t show it…either because hes too busy at work to show it…or because he doesn’t know ow to express himself anymore..believe me he used to..as in this guy cried once and told me ow much he loved me deeply now we are at a point that theres no mushy mushy in the relationship. Its all strait talk or crudeness as in crude jokes etc..but im tired of tryin to read btw the lines of that crudeness to know he cares,,.,,,
PRE
Just the other day I had an argument with the hubby this was the most lil argument that certainly went out of hand….
It all started with I cant even remember clearly…but just a normal argument as to wat we doin for the day and banter lead to banter and then next thing he says that’s ow I have been raised to be confrontational…and that pissed me off on a next level…then he says do I know ow many women out there will be happy to have a man that goes to work 7 days a week and provides for the family…rather than sit home and do nothing and my reply to him was ….GO AND FUCKIN MEET THEM THEN!….my peeps at blogger im not one to swear or curse as per xtian but since e don abuse the way I was raised…I just lost my cool…abuse here and then I abuse am back etc…for the first time I stood up to him and abused his family back…im one never to do that because I think in abusing my man im abusing God I respect him that much and he agrees that I have never abused him like that before.
So moving on…we went quiet and we weren’t talking to each other he was sleepin all day woke up at 5pm cos he was workin all nite…this was a Saturday so I was waiting up for him so we can at least go and do some Saturday shoppin etc…he woke up the argument continued and then 10pm he begins to snore on the sofa and then I lost my cool like shebi u just woke up at 5pm now 10pm ure sleepin again with no attempt to end the argument,..,.he got angry and said what do I want him to do…I said lets at least try and resolve this before u go to bed… im tired of carryin on like this etc,,,
Next thing his hands are on my neck and his choking me on the floor., my voice all muffled I say to him is this wat I deserve for tryin to end an argument …he carries on choking me..after a while he lets go off me …and all hell breaks loose I abuse his mum and father etc…and he just sat there abusing me back…I need a break
I must state we have never had an argument like this before never had domestic violence etc…im not making excuses for him but since then…it has felt like all I hold dear and love has crashed…..don’t have a dad …mums not available….the only thin I can call my own…..has now become a bitter experience…
How do I move on from this …I cant even look him in the face anymore…cos wen I do all I see is the angry face that was choking me….he has apologised umpteen times etc but I just cant get away from it ….he says loves me ….i cant even bring myself to say I love him anymore..doesn’t make sense to me that love can be domestic violence.
Through my actions of tryin to find the love left in me…I do not want to push him away. U know wen a woman goes quiet cos shes hurtin so bad…if it lingers too long the guy will get tired of beggin and if ure not avail to him as a wife there are many hyena’s out there waitin to take ur space and listen to him…
So my people this is what im goin thru I know its ok to feel the way I do, but I cant feel the way I do for too long or else my marriage will crash…but he cant expect too much from me cos im sure im allowed to hurt…but u must agree im not allowed to hurt for too long…im expected to heal for the sake of my baby, my marriage and because I want this to work ……;(
ur girl barefeet!
Friday, 14 May 2010
my thots beg to b exagerrated!
Amazing ow even when there was money u were too busy to be lively...u worked so hard that u lost d central reason y u worked...u jus
Worked cos thats all u ever knew...u had a family to deal with...but u were too busy...now theres no work no money ure so vacant u dont know what to do with ur time spent not having money.
Funny ow with the money i thot of u as a man of substance now theres no money...ure changing...more hungry for the money than uve ever been that u damn the consequences of ur xter cos somehow u think wen u get d money again ull fix things....the charade of thots continue...my thots beg to be exaggerated...
Funny ow ur smile is based on the fact that theres money and ure providing...but somehow i come from a planet where we smile watever the weather...cos every moment counts...that way wen theres no money there are good memories anyway....
U work so hard lose ur smile and spirit, and there are no memories to fall back on...all i can remember are the million promises of how much harder you need to work to acheive a break...and then we'll catch up later....later seems like a lifetime...cos even now...when u have a break in disguise--- redundancy---- i dont know who u are...
When u worked u promised me everythin..quality time etc that never happened...
Now ure not working...quality time will never happen
Ull have memories of things u cuda acheived if u were working
Ill have memories of how i hoped quality time will come soon regardless of the money...
My love is priceless
M y love is cheap
My love is simple...give me wat i give u
My love is unending..somehow urs is centred around wat u earn...wen ure not earnin u cnt love me
My love is crying..ur love door is shut until the next pay cheque
My love is infinite...
Ur love is finite..dependent on the figure on ur income
If only ...if only...u cud love me regardless of the highs and lows of life...somehow...im to love you irrespective of ur highs and lows..my highs and lows....?
My thots beg to be exaggerated?....
p.s to everyone waiting on the feedback from my dad's sis..omo im still waitin ooo....she aint calld yet....guess shes not bk from naija!
Its ur girl barefeet!
Friday, 30 April 2010
feedback..to be\not 2 be
I had a txt that i drafted before i put up my post..so heres d text
Barefeet; hi im not sure if you know me..my father gave me ur number a whie back..just thot id say hi...tk care barefeet
I wanted to make sure d number worked so i called from my work fone...she picked up sayin hello...and i dropped...
I didnt want to call her...as the manner in which she replies if i say...its barefeet might make me hate my decision for life...so i thot id send d text first to get her prepared...so i sent her d text..thinking she'll text bk then she called me immediately...i cant do suspense like Myne..
I was pondering do i pick up d call and what d hell do i say ...i was hpin she'll text that'll make it easier...
Girl on d fone; helloo
Barefeet; hi
Girl on d fone; thats barefeet rite
Barefeet,; yeh ure bleep bleep
Girl on d fone; ow u doin
Barefeet,; im ok and u...
girl on d fone; im fine thanks its ur dads sister...where abouts do u stay
Barefeet; erm ealing broadway..its on d central line
Girl on d fone; hmm ok im at catford..but im on my way to nigeria at d moment
Barefeet; so ure my dads sis..
Girl on d fone; yes i am...from his mothers side
barefeet; erm have i met u before like in nigeria cos i cnt remember much
Girl on d fone; no i dont think so
Barefeet; cos ive met a girl thats dark skinned and another one was light skinned
Girl; chuckles...theres loads of us..from d mother and father side...anyway no prob on my way to d airport sha...hp ure ok tho
Barefeet; yeh
Girl on d fne; no prob good that u calld id save ur number and when i get bk frm naija we can hook up
Barefeet; no prob
And we exchanged our goodbyes.
My people that was it...so many things goin thru my head....
1. theres lots of them from the mother and father side....so is that y he never gave a toss about me...and took after his parents children evrywhere that he cudnt keep track of them...annoyingly i can only assume hes not here to tell me otherwise...
2.good u called...was she aware of d last convo i had with my dad sayin i dont want to know her now..i just want to know my dad then her later..
Yes im ur dads sister...i thot he sent me a text sayin...do u know u have a sis in london...so thats meant to be...do i know he has a sister in london...theres me thinking i have siblings....but there his siblings not mine...so that was kinds dissapointing...but all in all good she wants to hook up ...not sure wen she is back...i guess she was asking if im ok..as per my dads death...the if's and buts go on....until she calls to say she has returned d qs continue...if only he had answered d qs before he died....
Its ur girl barefeet!
Monday, 26 April 2010
10 things i love
Ok everybody dey blogsville dey write holy holy...as per ten things they love....well barefeet is gonna tell it ow it is...
1..for some reason lately im crazed about sex...yeh i said it....people i started out as a virgin...my husband has fed me the forbidden fruit and now saying im drunk with sex is an understatemnt...as in my husband now avoids been naked around me etc...in other words...now i know y girls or guys start and cant stop...blady hel...the tin sweet...just cant get enuf...and i guess wateva is being given is dammmmmnnn gud...or else i wont be here writin this...I know uu want to hear more mschew...Moving on
2. I love money....ideas pop into my head like once or twice a day...as to how i can make money...and begin to drive my range...
3. I love to question everythin...im not gonna let anything go past my nose without snifffin
4, this list is gettin boring erm...i love watching porn...as it gives me ideas as to how i go wound my husband....still tryin to curb this habit tho...
5. I love to analyse peeps as in...y da hell has he got that haircut...damn girl u look like u got the weight of d world on ur shoulders...damn i need to wear sunglasses too many fine brovas walking around...im not allowed to look...that kind of analyse...
6.i love to write...as in i look forward to writin on my train journeys to uni...and anytime i can
7. I like feelin extra comfy...not one of those girls that wear clothes that look like its been drawn on them....i even go the extent of wearing my hubbys boxers wen i need some air down there...sebi u want to know wat i love lol
8. Wen hubby goes to work i love to wear his clothes ,..his perfume...the fact that the size dont fit...just gives me a cozy feeling as if he's with me wrapped all around me etc...p.s he works nigts 4 days a week...i love wearing his shoes whilst doin d housework..altho he has told me wat ones i can wear lol...u shud see his face wen he tries to tell me in a sweet yet irritated manner... He says barefeet pls not my new trainers...can u wear the one i use for the gym...lol
9. I love God....all my life ive done everythin because it will please him...if it aint pleasing him ...i dont mind bein the sore thumb amongst my friends...id rather be on Gods side than everyone else's...so terribly love him it shivers me timbers...as in i even pray that the holy spirit teaches me ow to please my hubby in bed...thats ow much i love God as in my hommie...funny enuff he surely works in mysterious ways if u know wat i mean...wink
10. I love my hubby...my wonderful baby lil baba..my bestfriend kenechi!...my mum r.i.p....blogsville u guys give me jokes everytime i log in...and thats me..
aint tagging no one as im on mi fone...
to be or not to be?
a while back i must have written about my dad....ill give u a summary
When my mum became pregnant with me....as per yoruba culture they went forward to my dads family to say ...apparently ur son got our daughter pregnant wat u goin to do about it...he refused that he didnt get my mum pregnant and my mums family left in shame....after a few months my dad comes with his family members to see my mum etc...and pay their respects as per she had given birth...so the question was asked y did u deny the pregnancy in the first place....he said his mum told him to etc...sha my mums side of the family....got angry with the excuses and asked him to leave...he never returned till i was about 7yrs of age....in this passage of time my mum dies due to complications after my birth...so he visits to give me sme food stuff...garri beans rice....and fingers chocolate to be precise....my mums family accepted it but he wasnt welcome still especially with the death of tiheir daughter...moving on he then returns 3 years later when i ws about 10...but stayed 5mins i told him my b.day ws comin up and he promised he wud come over but he nevr did or called etc...since then i never saw him...so it was a total of 3 times i saw him...then i was about 14...told a few lies and went to look for him...and he was never available...the one time i saw him...he just gave me loads of cash and i mean like £2000 back in 1997 and asked me if school was goin ok...didnt ask much about my personality and gettin to know me...he was too busy....moving on...
Sha i came to london and never visited or told him i was leaving cos he wsnt pulling his weight to see me....he was always busy and always had an excuse y..i got to london and with anger i let him remain in the past....moving on to last yr...my husband needed to know who my dad was..so i begged him that i dont want to open that chapter of my life....cos i dont think my dad wud do anything different to wat he did in d past....he wud not rejoice that im back in his life...my husband wanted to prove me wrong and went in search of my dad...i dont have his address or details...got his number thru some1 etc...and when we called his was more angry at the fact that no one told him wen we got married ...anywhoo im like he must really think himself as important cos hes not treated me like that all my life...so why shud i make him important....we went past that and started talkin maybe 1nce a month...but he never spoke much or gave me much to work with...he wud ask me ow u doin my baby my husband,..hp im ok...and then bye....my people that was the sequence of things for a whole year no further qs asked....he suffered a stroke and was recovering...then he sent me a txt at 6am...saying ..do u know u have a sister over there in london her name is bleep bleep and this is her number....then at 11am he calls with the such emotional joy than i have ever heard him express not even the first time he saw me...then he said...
Dad; hello barefeet did u get my message that i sent u this mornin..
Barefeet; yes i did...but im surprised at d reason u sent me tht txt
Dad; y wats the problem
Barefeet; its amazing that i dont know anythin about u...and now u want me to know my sis...i wuda thot we establish our relationship first then u introduce me to the other members of the family...for example u dont know wat day i ws born my birthday...u dont have a clue as to my personality i dont know anythin about u or the day u were born all i know is ur my father and im ur daughter....how about gettin to know each other then everyone else...
dad; ok no problem
Barefeet; is dat it....ure not goin to say anything else...
dad; its not somethin we can talk about on the fone...we wud need to see physically to talk about it (not sure if i mentioned he ws in nigeria and im in the uk)
Barefeet; rite ok no problem
I cudnt be asked to indulge him in more as he wanted to wait till we see to do these things and my qs is how long is it before i see him like,...who has promised us tomor....and then d next day he sent a txt saying...
Dad; my text to u yesterday ws with constructive intentions not destructive if i have touched any raw nerves...my apologies are hereby tendered!
Saw this and i replied
Barefeet; not a problem u havent touched any raw nerves...i just need to know u...and build a relationship with u first then i can then be introduced to the other members of the family...
this was last yr april....since then i didnt hear from him he never called me like he used to ....not a word from him...my brithday was in june...and i was hopin in my heart of hearts he might have enquired from wherever to find out and surprise me with a call....nothin ...he never calld...then this yr jan i got a call and i was told hes dead....how i felt is a different story,...for another day....im done grieving but lately i find myself goin back to tht text askin me to call my estranged sister....ill let u guys know....ive searched for her on fb and asked for her friendship considering my surname has changed she will not know who i am ,...so might not accept my request...even if she did accept my request that doesnt mean she knows who i am....so moving on...ive been starin at that msg and now ive moved from that and saved the number to my phonebook...people seriously that was a major for me....now the qs is do i call her text her...get in touch with her...wat am i to say,....do i need to open this door in my life ...as wat i might find might not be good....
In the sense that wen i opened d door to my dad....and wen i went searchin for him at d age of 14....he was everythin everyone told me he was....non chalant and took everythin in his stride...didnt push to get anythin done ...as a matter of urgency...so that left me with a sour taste in my mouth then my husband came along and my dad did no different....do i call her or do i just let that part of my life end with his death...is it worth it or not...is it to be or not to be...peeps i need ur advice...frank advice...
Ur girl barefeet!
Thursday, 22 April 2010
Moh-hawk-frican
Man on train....are u from africa...yes...wat part of africa...nigeria....ahhh thats good ...u look like my ghanian daughter, he pauses ok im going now bye bye...im like....ooooooo...k thanks bye...
Does he really think i wuda struck a convo with him on that basis...anywhooo movin on
My african brothers heres a lesson or two for ya....regardin the mo hawk hair cut.....david beckham made it popular and it suited him...y cos hes white and he got straight hair....
Lesson number 1...please dont bother with a mo hawk if u aint got nice straight hair or at least wavy hair ask ur barber he'll give u d hair wax that men use to get some curls in naija its called sportin waves...u know like the way somalian guys have their hair it comes to them naturally...so lesson to be learnt pls avoid the mo hawk if u aint got nice hair...we dont want to see ta koko hair in a mo hawk its a disaster...ta koko means nigerian hair or african hair thats terribly not straight and it curls around itself no matter how u comb it...wen u look at d whole head it looks like little dots of hair on the head and lots of space inbtw...def not a smooth mane...this kind of hair is a taboo for a mo hawk ....
Lesson 2 pls avoid a mo hawk altogether my african brothers if u use ur girlfriends relaxer it will look wrong i guarantee u...the hair will become spikey and ull look like a wet chicken....like i said ask ur barber for mens curling wax...it defines ur curls rather than flattens ur hair like an ironed shirt...
Lesson 3...my african brothers avoid a mohawk(pulling my ears like ud see in the nigerian movies) its bad enuf that ure not white pls dont put no estranged colour in it....blonde...red...etc...ur black it does not suit black guys...except ur sisqo ...
And lastly pls dis appiles to both sexes abeg una these geeky glasses in vogue does not suit everyone..c'mon..it takes a certain swag to pull it off...the fact that chris brown is rocking it dont mean u can....ask ur family ..friends and strangers goin past ur house if its nice before steppin out and acting like ure the ish! Kmt
Apart from that i have nothing to report...until 2mr when my journey on d train continues..sugar king still hopin to bump into u one of these days on zzz platforms...
Ur girl barefeet!
silence vs speech
Lately had a fat argument with the other half as my recent posts wud have indicated.....
My personality
Im some1 who tells u wateva im thinking and try my best to be diplomatic this has won me few friends and few foes...if i see something i speak it....i struggle to lie....the way i see it is ...tell the truth and damn the consequences wats d worst that can happen...even when i ws about to get married to my husband pastor felt i was fornicating bla bla bla he asked me i said yes we kissed and fondled lol....its that bad i struggle to lie...i cuda saved myself the shame by sayin ahh no sir over my dead body...but hey he cant kill me...so i told d pastor yes...they sha told me to either choose my husband or the choir....im sure u can guess wat i chose....story for another day
So as i ws saying ...so there was an argument and i can say it stemmed from me always saying wat i think...if there somein left on d floor that shudnt be there,...ill let hm know and then clean it up etc...so that in future he will know ahh barefeet will not be happy with this....so i guess too mch of this led to him feelin constantly criticised or nagged at...well well..well id like to think that chapter is closed....only for the next day usually the making up day where d woman is to be feelin pampered etc cos hes tryin to show her he cares and did not mean the things said in argument....that was not the case he was on the pc all day and on his fone ....darling im off to work ....yeh ok he kept on typin away...totally frustrated i stormed out of the house....typically as barefeet i wuda called him immediately told him ow i felt ignored he wasnt pullin his weight how he shudve...he was being insensitive the barrage of words etc....but then got to work and i got a text 'r u ok u seemed upset when leaving' and i said to myself make thunder fire devil...mscheww...stupid qs and now hes acting like he aint got a clue...my reply 'nope at all was just rushin off to work'
I was bare vexed that i didnt let him have piece of my mind....but the aftermath was worth it ...
The next day he called me saying we shud go for lunch somewhere....whilst eating lunch he said how happy he is to have lunch with me...that its been a while esp after d argument kissed me and said the first propa kiss since our argument...as per for the sake of courtesy u kiss hi and goodbye even in an argument etc...im wont let u in to everything he said...knowing my usual husband if i had mentioned something the night before that hes not pulling his weight he wuda buckled under that pressure and be lost in regards to pleasin me.....
Second example came out of the shower he spilled water everywhere this one i had to talk...darling pls help us mop the water so i and baby dont slip....e no answer me...im like shut ur mouth barefeet..and just let him do it in his time...im sure he heard u....i went back 5 mins later he was ironing ...im like o.....k he hasnt mopped the floor yet i was about to say something...den i chose to shut up as if i mentioned it twice it wud def look like nagging.....i was about to step out of the house when i saw him get the mop and was cleanin...and i left saying love u etc etc etc
So the moral of the story is call it lyin or wateva u want when ur other half asks u wats wrong and u say nothin to save the peace
Call it holding ur tongue back or not being honest or telling him how u feel on a need to know basis call it wateva it works wonders...i find it hard and it hurts me like hell as per my m personality i find it hard to deny my feelings i just blurt it out...but its well worth it....
Ps facebook again saw a status saying....please pray for my friend amanda she had her wedding and the wedding photographer forgot he had no film in his camera and took the pictures of the day. He has just told the bride the bad news, she has fainted and is hospitalised...pleease pray for her...
Its a bad thing to happen ooo..but which one be the faintin...pictures aint worth my life...or is it me being insensitive...?
Monday, 19 April 2010
plain english!
the fact that u break ur back working on hours on end does not make u a good husband
the fact that u say ure sorry does mean u intend to change
The fact that u say ull change does not mean u see a need to change
The fact that u threaten at things ull do does not mean ill wait around till ull do them
The fact that u make promises with the best of intentions doesnt mean u plan to do them
The fact that you dont plan anything means those promises will never be fulfilled
The fact that everythin works per chance does mean ull always be lucky
The fact that ure hpin to be lucky doesnt mean ill be cupid sit around and wait till u get it right
The fact that they say women are so complicated doesnt automatically include me
The fact that they say women are complicated i speak in plain language...yet ur pride gets in the way of ur understanding...y? Cos men hate instructions...
I.e i want to spend time with u lets have a picnic in our garden since theres no money to dine out..ill like to think this is plain english
He interpretes it as he needs some time for himself ...he'll make himself happy and get on his bike and we can have the picnic later...he comes hme late picnic is cancelled and im to bloody blame cos I SHUDA WAITED FOR U TO COME BACK!
W.....T......F! I hear u say no be me talk am i be xtain...
Sunday, 18 April 2010
its a mans world
First party the man
He goes to work brings the bacon home...protector of the family etc...cant fill in the gaps as i no be man...neither am i tryin to play down their role
2nd party
She goes to work but still never has any time off work...plans the life of the family...the holidays...the days out...the romantic getaways whilst the man works away....they go on the planned journey evryone has a good time etc...the bit no one ever says is the thank u...for working behind the scenes,...either cos it not hours that cn be shown on a payslip...or maybe cos she just assumes the roles upon herself..the other half automatically doesnt see the need to mention thank u and appreciate her...
Somehow the hours the man puts in are reflected in his pay slip etc...so he gets the gratitude...the cooked meals before he ccmes hme ...the massages..etc...
Where am i goin here....no matter how bloody hard i work (am not talkin about the 9-5) because as a woman once u clock out from work and come hme...the rest of the work u do is not accounted for neither is it thot of as much...this is totally unfair...
The man can go to work for hours on end and come hme and chill...this is an option for him...for a woman she goes out to work and she has no option but to come hme and take care of the kids....
it is truelly a mans world...
Friday, 16 April 2010
change...
Ow the young generation are striving to act older...primark having padded bra's for 7yr olds
Etc
Whilst the older generation are desperately tryin to be young with plastic surgery etc
Ow some many peeps inc myself strive to get the dosh and yet u get the dosh and its never enuff...the greed is endless....amazing ow ur salary is never good enuff,...u always want to be better paid
Ow every nigerian i look at lately seem to hv the word responsibilty on their foreheads...they got fam bk hme they gotta cater for
Ow we feel good we cn spk a diff language albeit yoruba ibo etc...that way if u dnt want to be understood on d outside...u cn spk in ur language....yet the new gen dont want to be identified as nigerian or definitely deny they cnt spk or understand their native language...bk in my days it was like a trophy wen u could spk ur language
Amazing that everythin mentioned above has not changed yet it seems like its changes the only difference is the extent and degree to which it was dne ...its always been that way....it will continue to....no surprise...
Thursday, 15 April 2010
they are yellow black or white...
Im on the train at the mo and the different personalities etc are so evident now that its summer....i knda guess in winter theres a common consensus as to the dress code....and even if there wasnt wateva u wore there was a coat to cover it....so literally a lot of sore heads dont stand out...ok here goes.....
saw a post on the net the other day saying wen black peeps sweat they smell...im like who doesnt....anywhoo a topic for another day....
ive got my goths to the right the train is approaching at full speed he steps on his skate board and his friend mimicks pushin him off the platform and they start laughin...all black clothing with manscar and eye pencil...all the hair full of mousse and blow dried to give some ompth...im like y do they try so hard to draw attn or stand ouut....surely its ok not to be noticed or is it just me
Ive got my african bro standing in front of me listening to his ipod....wearing black faded boxers sagging badly...and im like seriously a mans boxers is his pant! Peope its pants....if a woman wants to sag its only becos she just bought new panties or thongs so she wears her jeans just a lil low....but wat is it with men....somehow they think their boxers aint pants...so we got some faded boxers that hes had after 3 yrs and hes saggin
Wats with brothers i mean blood brother sharing boxers...like id speak for myself so cant share pants with my sis if i had one...but hold on lol after writing that line i just realised that on those hot nights in summer i actually do wear hubbys boxers....argh theres no basis for this post ill be back again...
nb theres bare beef everywhere for some reason...its like everypage i click someone is venting or letting off steam about somein that happened
Myne....first time i got to ur blog and saw a feel of ur personality....as per the sugar thingy...kinds made me understand u better..as u dont have a personal blog
Cant remember her name...as im writing this on my fone....the lady with the trouble of csdf and cds...lol....definitely got the abbreviations wrong...yeh she too is feeling down as per wat she said and ow its got her in trouble...
And then on fb i see someone status sayin...pls dont u ever come to my wall and write stuff like that i do not appreciate it..and keep ur nose out of it cos its nt ur business capisce...
Im like na wetin happen read the thread and found out that the culprit had left a msg saying....happy birthday darling wish u the best...and long life...ps try and lose some weight...
O boy...on some1's birthday u write that and its not even a private message u put it on her wall habaa...so much yawa everywhere...im out me sef i get my own yawa to sort out.
Monday, 12 April 2010
fawlty towers
Rite its the first week of summer over here in the uk,..aand we got man dem wearing sweat pants, track suit bottoms etc....my dear brothers if u want to wear track suit bottoms pls wear the right boxers...or briefs...and if ure planning to show off ur fawlty towers underneath ur trousers....abeg u ....pls be sure that wat u have is visually condusive.....kai
Just standing at the platform at liverpool street waiting for my train and a brova walking past had some nike sweat pants on and
1. He wasnt wearing the right briefs\boxers
2. which means his fawlty towers were dangling evrywhere
3. The fawlty towers were definitely not visually appealing
4. Y i hear u ask? they were small, wonky and it was sidelined....
My thing is u definitely cnt say to me u dont arrange urself down there when u wear ur boxers or tuck in ur shirt or wen u obviously wear something revealing......
My advise flaunt it 0NLY if u have it....wear good boxers or briefs that hold it INTACT...we dont want a juggling act...especially wen its a miniature act...and lastly manage arrange urself down there we ladies are flatpacked but u guys need to deal with the three fold...2 balls and the fawlty towers...so fold it properly abegg...my eyes are bleeding...
Ps......i dont go around looking at fawlty towers oooo... And dont act like u aint ever seen a fawlty tower....u might have but never spoken of it....so cut me some slack lol
Friday, 2 April 2010
public secret?
Surely words cant describe u?
Surely theres a reason y everyone's talkin about u?
Surely theres a reason why ure d most written about?
Surely theres more to the story of evolution...?
Surely theres more to christianity?
surely theres more to prayin and answered prayers?
Surely theres more to love?
Surely theres more to christ?
all of these questions bring me to the next line
Yes theres more to u thats y ure called the personal Jesus...
U work for me totally differently than someone in congo (ps just listened to this song on you tube - sing for joy in congo...amazing worship)
theres more to you thats y...
Ure 'skyped' out of this world
Cyberspace cud nt limit u on 'myspace'
Miliion faces are tagged to u on 'facebook'
getting drunk in the spirit and high on 'hi5'
banter and chatter of u on 'twitter'
Surely theres more to u...so much to knw...i only ask to knw a fraction thats known to nobody else..?!
Friday, 12 March 2010
virgin vs porn
Like it says in the beginning...
As u grow ure told do not watch porn or God go punish u! Lol...then ure told to be celebate till marriage...and this applies to the guys...somehow this is nt expected of the guys...well thats a topic for another day..
from my experience...
Was told its wrong to watch porn as its not a married couple carrying out the act thus definitely nt bornagain so na evil spirit ...so because theyre nt bornagain peeps having sex it cant be right or holy...
One ure told to be a virgin till marriage?
Two ure told not to watch porn?
So here goes my qs wth! Are u supposed to do wen u get married?! Learn on the job and do the wrong things i.e where to put it and where nt to put it...hmm hmm for the men ...im sure u knw wat i mean...
For the woman...ow on earth am i supposed to knw ow to please my man and the do's and donts...according to my friend there are loads of books out there...reading a book is different from first hand (i dnt mean physically lol) watching ow its done on tv....are there xtian books on how to please ur partner in bed...and the barrage of qs continue...
I got into my marriage nt having a clue..wat a mans pleasure points are now thank God for grace and a patient partner whos willing to do a walkthrough...imagine if he was a virgin as well...of course i wud have to watch porn to learn ow its done....truth is dat its thru porn that i learnt the things i do now...imagine if i never did...my confidence at pleasing my man wud be zilch..
So my people they say i shud be a virgin until marriage ok i gree...been there don dat...they say i shud not watch porn...me i cant fit gree...as long as i dont jerk off which is nt rite i make sure its for the purpose of my marriage and not to fulfill my personal desires to masturbate. it is the only way i cn learn to please my man especially wen hes got AMPLE EXPERIENCES under his sleeve thats made him the man he is today...
So as i walk thru the valley of watching porn
I will fear no evil of feeling inexperienced
For Thou art with me...to put the things i see into practice and perfect them
the new cliche i have been taught to wait and hv waited all my life to have sex and then wen its time to have sex i hv not been taught by my bible or my pastors how to have sex!
Tuesday, 2 March 2010
age concern
surely the 9months spent in my mothers womb shud be counted...ive always got my age mixed up...wen people ask me i say 23 or 22...and tell them to figure it out 1987 and 2010...wats d diff....the last time i remembered my age was wen i was 21 i guess cos i was doin the big countdown like we all do...and after that my memory has failed me..i feel older and speak older...think older yet im only 23 or 22....not sure...whilst at lectures today im like hold on a minute if im 23 then based on my calculations im 23yrs and 9months old...if an added 3 months were added to that..its 24 yrs old...so for every time its my birthday i shud really add another year to it...
Y's the 9months in the womb not added...dont tell me about conception date..cos it can usually be worked out roughly...so there goes the reason for the constant comment ..."ahh i always thought u were like 25 or 26 yrs old" yes ure rite im close im 24 yrs old not 23 this yr...
and if this theory makes it to the papers...remember barefeet spoke of it on her blog first...!
Monday, 1 March 2010
eh..chai...chineke me..swagaa!
So wat u have is...even conductor sef dey my television dey sing...if u can sing as good as a frog...u can make it on my tv...with the blessing of autotune....mscheww....
In other words wat u need is a catchy beat...loadsa autotune....some money for baffs...or if u no get baffs wear jeans and cap no shirt...just show ur dry chest....or six pack...and there u hv it...a recipe for a naija music video....
Dont get me wrong oo...d music is a lot beta than it used to be wen all we had was plantashun boiz and style plus d end...i love the variety now...but now too many copy cats....and peeps that shud either recognise that singing or rappin aint it...or they shud respect their age...i dont want some old baffoon on my tv...telling me of some omoge that he promises a good time...go and give ur wife a gud time..
i would love to mention names...but i can remember d videos not the names...actually charlie boy...wth Is that nu carolina video about...so doesnt suit his age having thonged butts dancing in his video esp at his age...i dont mind if he remixes d carolina song which came out wen i was like a 3yr old girl...now im old...got a kid and husband and i get a remix of carolina?..
As i was saying i dont mind if he remixes the song...to get some money for his retiremnt...but surely he shud respect his age...and have girls dancing if he insists ...but not naked with thongs and bra's...
anywhoooooo moving on feelin m.i and some other artists,,,who hv a mix of autotune and some good lyrics...not eh and chai..and im on fire with some guy shining torch lite in my eye....talkless of bobie eh...mschew..
eh..chai...chineke me..swagaa!
So wat u have is...even conductor sef dey my television dey sing...if u can sing as good as a frog...u can make it on my tv...with the blessing of autotune....mscheww....
In other words wat u need is a catchy beat...loadsa autotune....some money for baffs...or if u no get baffs wear jeans and cap no shirt...just show ur dry chest....or six pack...and there u hv it...a recipe for a naija music video....
Dont get me wrong oo...d music is a lot beta than it used to be wen all we had was plantashun boiz and style plus d end...i love the variety now...but now too many copy cats....and peeps that shud either recognise that singing or rappin aint it...or they shud respect their age...i dont want some old baffoon on my tv...telling me of some omoge that he promises a good time...go and give ur wife a gud time..
i would love to mention names...but i can remember d videos not the names...actually charlie boy...wth Is that nu carolina video about...so doesnt suit his age having thonged butts dancing in his video esp at his age...i dont mind if he remixes d carolina song which came out wen i was like a 3yr old girl...now im old...got a kid and husband and i get a remix of carolina?..
As i was saying i dont mind if he remixes the song...to get some money for his retiremnt...but surely he shud respect his age...and have girls dancing if he insists ...but not naked with thongs and bra's...
anywhoooooo moving on feelin m.i and some other artists,,,who hv a mix of autotune and some good lyrics...not eh and chai..and im on fire with some guy shining torch lite in my eye....talkless of bobie eh...mschew..
Friday, 26 February 2010
Marriage to Gus?!
Thats not the case with people who have married for the wrong reasons and kinda wish and hp for a miracle....unfortunately wat u find is entrapment. For me i define mine as love we love each other to a default....wenever we have an arguement u cn see we are tryin to look out for the others benefit and good. 90% of the arguemnts are mostly about ow u care about the other ...and ow u convey that in an arguement is wat makes or breaks d marriage.
I used to be a fan of love is all we need, but abeggi....if theres so much love and no communication forget it....love cannot carry u thru!
Secondly i used to be a fan of love is wat u need in order to marry thats out the window now....compatibility is all ur mentality needs....not compatible and ull go insane cos ud either back down in frustration or be at logger heads....i actually sat down last week and said nawaooo....tru talk there are so many loveless marriages out there...everyones looking for a companion...thats d essence of marriage not love d end....barefeet don talk....
So wen u see me complain about this love tin sef...just leave me o jare...cos then im in the gallows....but then after the turmoil and heartache of love and marriage i find that im walking on the clouds cos im with someone whos compatible and loves me ...which is a bonus...cos i still get swept off my feet which i cnt say for many marriages ....tru tru no one ever says d truth about their marriage....but hey same thing about life u never know wat to expect...u make it wat u want it to be....so according to barefeet truthfully my marriage is wat i make it...ill recommend it cos
its bad... its heart wrenching....its head soaring....its orgasmic.....!
Thursday, 25 February 2010
rollercoaster loving to ode loving?!
But the very reason I tire is wat excites me…
In my favourite phrase “exciting times” and then I rub my hands together
One minute ur heart is bleeding
The next its soaring…
I started out y.day hating myself and wantin my world to end…
Now I feel like yesterday never happened and say nawoo
Im desperately tryin to understand this love tin sef …
But as a woman ure so ruled by emotions
On the other hand I don’t have much to say
Yet I have a lot to say …im loggin on and its like there are no new posts
Im like o…..k where everyone col don catch una…sugarking u just dey put comments I dey wait ur posts na!
GO ON MYNE..awooo! ( ure levels don change now…)
And Juanita and leggy erm that’s all I can remember
Apart from that no one’s writing nothn…well nothing that tickles my fancy
Ok ive got a lil story for y’all lemme knw ur thots its titled
This is a true story and its happening to someone I grew up with..and shes 39yrs old
Sade has had her misfortunes with guys they come along sleep with her and end it with her …the end..
Sha story lead to story and now shes with a guy in London…whilst shes based in Nigeria
Problem 1
She comes over about twice a year to visit but sade stays with her sis wenever she visit she doesn’t stay over at the guys house for wateva reason best known to them
Problem 2
Shes never been to this guys house in the 2 years they been together weneva shes in London they go out for meals etc kill their agro wherever ii don’t have that much detail and she is dropped bk hme at her sisters.
Problem 3
Sade is not introduced to his mother,,,,
This is ow we brought this whole façade to lime light
Her sis that she stays with called her and sat her down u know the naija way
Sade sis; Sade ure goin out with this guy uve never been to his house
Sade; and so its not the most important thing on the list
Sade sis; ow can u be in a relationship with a guy and u don’t know where he lives and u travel all the way from naija to see him
Secondly uve never met his mother or spoken to his mother …and there rumours goin in Festac that the mum doesn’t like u?
Sade; what is ur business let me deal with this the way I know best
The convo ended there and then out of vexation sade pick fone call her bobo
Sade; wen am I comin to see you now…I don’t want to go to another restaurant
Bobo; erm not sure ooo…will let u know im thinking in 2 weeks is that ok
Sade; I guess and erm I remember u told me about ur mum that she stays in London when are we goin to see her
Bobo; erm not sure about that one oo, except u want me to introduce u as my friend to my mother. …But I can’t introduce u as anything else
Sade; Ah y are u speakin to me this way…
Bobo; it’s the truth we got so many problems uve got too many mood swings…and u want us to hop and visit my mum…
That’s ow the first convo ended
Second convo goes like this
Sade; its over 2weeks now I still haven’t been invited to ur house wats happening
Bobo; im thinking we shud even make this our relationship more concrete how about a wedding in august?
Sade; ahh that wud be nice..wat church wud we be having it etc
Third convo goes like this
Bobo; ok im free this afternoon.,. get dressed ure comin to my house
Sade; ah thank God finally she said to herself
They arrive at bobos house at 1500..he tell her to take a sit and he’ll be a minute goes upstairs for about 30 mins comes bk downstairs and says r u ready lets go to bicester.
My people bicester from where he lives is 2hrs journey time
She grudgingly gets in the car says nothing and they arrive at Bicester…
They shop around for another 2 hrs and I mean window shopping…
After a while wen hunger wire sade
She open mouth in vexation and said
Pls do u have £10 so I can buy a drink and some snacks
Na so the guy vex
Bobo; with that ur big bag ure telling me u don’t have £10 If u don’t then me I don’t have
Sade; sha close eye…commot money buy lunch for them
He drops her back home and that was it oo my people…
She began blabbing and telling her sis at home of the story
Sis sade; imagine Ive not eaten all day
He took me to his house and we didn’t even spend time there he goes upstairs and comes back telling me lets go to bicester I thot o…k maybe he wants to take me shoppin
We went to bicester and didn’t spend a dime on me…no food nothing and he has brought me back to ur place….
sade sis; sorry ooo eya erm y u telling me all this ….y didn’t u complain to him?
Sade; I cant tell him na…u don’t know If u want to marry u have to act like an ode?!
Or else if u always tell him ow u feel he’ll think u complain too much?!
THIS IS WHERE MY BRAIN STOPPED FUNCTIONIN! like WTH!
Im sure u guys know where I stand with this guy hes got responsibilities and sade aint one one of his priorities…hes made that known to her but typically shes interpreted that as a positive….pls can someone explain to me is it because of her age that she thinks shes not got a choice anymore thus settling for less and she thinks she needs to be a mugu for the guy to love her? Mscheww…me im not one to hide my feelings so being a fool for a guy so he can love me don’t wrk…I say it ow I feel it…na by force to love?!
let me know wat u think?
Wednesday, 24 February 2010
Another used to be?
Is it ok for u to make love to me like we did the first time?
Is it ok for u to pour out ur emotions to me like u did when u asked me out?
Is it ok for me to be the sole reason y u wake and plan your day cos ure so excited to see me?
Is it ok for u to tell me how much u love me after love making rather than silence?
Is it ok for u to say the right things, rather than be quiet in fear that u might get it wrong?
Is it ok that you plan to spend time with me rather than stumble upon time spent with me?
Is it ok to make love to me with the intent and precision of an assassin?
Rather than with quickly and hurriedly as If u know the end before u began?
Is it ok for u to make promises and keep them?
For the fear of not fulfilling them will mean loosing me?
Rather than act like if u don’t fulfil them theres always another opportunity to do so?
Cos wen we started out u kept every promise for the fear that another guy might step in if u don’t? Now complacency and procastination?!
Is it ok that I dont remain the same whilst all these mishaps are happening?
Cos the thot of me changing is becoming so evident I cant even hide it no more?
Would u be as patient as Ive been... waiting for u to become who u were?
Would u be patient enough to wait for me to return to who I was?
Cos I waited and im still waiting for u ..wud u do the same for me
Whilst I get tired of the unfulfilled promises…the complacency and procastinations?
Would we wait for each other till we return to that which we first loved
Im scared ...would u wait?
R u scared I don’t think so and I don’t think ull wait cos ure a guy…guys don’t wait?! (sigh)